Patient Reassurance
“I’m so worried,” the nervous patient said as the nurse plumped up his pillows. “Last week, I read about a man who was in the hospital because of heart trouble and he died of malaria.”
“Relax,” the nurse said, smiling. “This is a first-rate hospital. When we treat someone for heart trouble, he dies of heart trouble.”
Respiratory Assessments
The nurse went in to check her respiratory distress patient in the Critical Care Unit who was getting oxygen via a mask. The nurse tried to talk to him, but all she could get out of him was gasping and unintelligible talk.
Finally, the nurse thrust a note pad and pencil at the patient and said, “I can’t understand you, sir. Please write it down.”
The patient weakly scribbled on the pad: “Get your foot off my oxygen tube!”
Doctor in Hell
A doctor dies and goes to hell. The devil greets him and tells him that since he was a doctor and did some good, he could choose his eternity.
A doctor dies and goes to hell. The devil greets him and tells him that since he was a doctor and did some good, he could choose his eternity.
The devil opens the first door. There are doctors hanging from their ankles being whipped by demons.
“Oh my God, I don’t want that,” the doctor exclaims.
The devil opens a second door to reveal doctors on fire being chased by huge beasts.
“That one is even worse!” says the doctor, getting more nervous.
The devil opens a third door to reveal doctors in lounge chairs being served tropical drinks by beautiful nurses.
“Sign me up for that eternity!” the doctor states.
The devil then slams that door and says, “You can’t go there—you weren’t supposed to see that.”
“Why can’t I go there?” the doctor asks.
The devil replies, “Well…that’s nurse hell.”
No comments:
Post a Comment